The complete, long-form, annotated Ten Rules of Journalism. Whatever annotated means.

Young journalists won't need any other guidance as they advance and go forward in their careers. Polished pro publishes his tips for guaranteed success and more.

Eric Mortenson

Jan 05, 2022

Illustration by Ellie Mortenson

There’s always something else. See the Tom Swan story. The First Rule of Journalism
Go see. I’ve written a piece about the second rule. Go read. The Second Rule of Journalism
The best interviews are conversations. Don’t be afraid to say, “I don’t get it.”
Thou shalt fuck up.
Thou shalt fuck up. The Fourth and Fifth Rule of Journalism
You might as well marry another journalist. You’ll still fight, but at least they’ll understand what you do and why you do it. And you’ll fight about that, too.
Somebody, somewhere, wrote it down. Like the town doctor who filled out the cause of death report in the story above of Oh Poor Tom Swan, the lawyer’s son.
Some of the journalism out there is accurate but not honest. Know the difference, and go for honesty every time.
There’s some kinds of a son-of-a-bitch you don’t have to be even to be a newspaperman. The Ninth Rule of Journalism
Thou Shalt Not Write in Journalese. Slay, eschew, temblor — I decry them all. The 10th Rule of Journalism
See Rule 1.
Copy editors will make you crazy. They will also save your ass.
Be patient. Some stories just need to percolate.
To be a good writer, read good writing. My early influences included John Steinbeck, for his mastery of everything, and Kurt Vonnegut for his short, punchy sentences and spirals of delightful nonsense. I loved reading the clever, insightful writers at Sports Illustrated, such as Frank Deford and Dan Jenkins. And many more, of course. And Mad Magazine, Saturday Night Live, The Simpsons and The Onion. I’m now in awe of Amor Towles, and everyone should read Mary Oliver.
Man discloses, God reveals. I don’t have an example at hand. I just wanted to include something from the late Bob Caldwell, a notable figure in Oregon journalism. He was managing editor at the Springfield News, my first job, and frowned when we wrote that someone “revealed” something. He later was head of The Oregonian’s editorial board.
Story ideas are everywhere. I found dozens of great stories in roadside signs, bulletin boards and classified ads. Seek out the modern equivalent. But get out and be curious: Who is that? What is that? What happened? How did that come to be? What do they do in there? Who paid for that? And why?
If you don’t love journalism, if it isn’t fun, go do something else. Newsrooms can be the funniest places. I worked at one paper, the wonderful Albany Demagogue-Herald, where we often described our routine actions in headline-speak. Like “Man sharpens pencil, none hurt,” or “Ringing phone annoys local woman.”
Sometimes we’re the only ones who tend the flame. The 18th Rule of Journalism.
Never turn down a cup of coffee. I borrowed this one from Mike Thoele, a gifted feature writer and editor in the Eugene Register-Guard’s glory days.
Collaborate with photographers. This is somewhat dated advice, since everyone uses their phone for photos and video, but working with a professional who sees the story the same way you do can make it soar. I was blessed to work with a series of photojournalists who were incredibly skilled, smart and hard-working, not to mention great company on the road. Blessed be the marriage of words and pictures.
On your way to the car, glance at your tires. Just a good practice, generally.
If you know what they said but aren’t sure what they meant, call them back and ask. What they meant is what you need to report.
What was the dog’s name? What do you mean, why?
It’s always the husband or the boyfriend, especially ex- types. They did it. Almost always.
The quotes you use in your stories should be like seasoning, not like glops of oatmeal. Usually, you can summarize it quicker and more clearly than they can speak it. One of the snappiest quotes I ever included in a story was two letters, “Yo.” The most devastating was two fingers, from a D-Day veteran who silently told me, with tears streaming down his face, how many German soldiers he’d killed 50 years before, when the world was at war.
Farmers and ranchers, as a group, are the smartest and most capable people I covered in my career. Entomologists were the most fun to interview, fascinating and often hilarious. Some cops, prosecutors and defense attorneys were great, some were assholes. Most official spokespeople are worthless, but I knew a few who were golden — honest and forthright and able to explain shit. Too many business types are small-minded; the bigger they get, the worse they get.
Did I mention there’s always something else?
Activists will read your stories far more closely than you will. And you’ll be disappointed at the nits they pick, because they seemed smarter when you interviewed them.
Describing people in any form of print is fraught — fraught, I say, ashen faced — with peril.
The best editors understand your story even if you can’t explain it to them. My three favorite editors are subscribers, by the way. In chronological order of influence: Hasso Hering, Kevin Miller and Joan Lucille Carlin. Great people.
Talk to the people who are actually doing the work. This rule probably should be in the Top Ten, because it’s important. You know who is doing the work in America? Black people and brown people. Go talk to them.
Call, email or text them again. Maybe they’ve had time to think it over, and they’ll talk to you after all.
When a good editor walks up to your desk and wants you to check on something odd, be like the people at the hardware store in my neighborhood. Be attentive, competent and can-do.
When a bad editor walks up to your desk and wants you to check on something dumb, scowl. Always — always — have a better story at hand.
I’ll probably think of more rules later.